wolfintestine:

sqr-knt:

Went out and bought a can of pineapple juice cuz Waka said it’d make my cum taste better

too bad your sock doesn’t have taste buds

image

(Source: shredbundy, via pizza)

  • police: THIS IS THE POLICE! OPEN YOUR DOOR NOW!!!
  • me: not with that attitude

jessepnkman:

ladies, if a guy doesn’t eat pussy but still expects to get his dick sucked… laugh right in his face. laugh as you put your clothes back on. leave the room in the midst of your laughter. go home while laughing. keep laughing for the rest of your life. never stop laughing.

(via thetomska)

dumbfricker:

obama has masturbated before

(via pizza)

3k626ekful7ozxujar43keiw236iw2h:

some ppls urls r so stupid smh

(Source: 3k626ekful7ozxujar43keiw236in2h, via sniffing)

nayx:

penis companies

(via vvankinq)

Timestamp: 1397739769

nayx:

penis companies

(via vvankinq)

vablatsky:

this game is why I have trust issues

(via vvankinq)

Timestamp: 1397739754

vablatsky:

this game is why I have trust issues

(via vvankinq)

life-gets-bad-sometimes:

qonorrhea:

text posts are like children
you delete the ones that dont succeed

what

(Source: michaxl, via pizza)

cool-dude-dave-strider:

how did people think before languages

(Source: davidleatherdaddy, via sniffing)

vincentvangaylord:

timeandspaceismything:

vincentvangaylord:

grandkanye:

imagine if giraffes had 2 legs

image

That just looks like the front view of a giraffe.

oh well excuse me princess do u need a sideview of it prancing through nature

image

(via pizza)

notahoe:

Having a crush on someone hotter and cooler than you it’s like Brushing your teeth for 5 hours straight and then drinking 20 glasses of orange juice

(Source: cyberho, via sniffing)

the-winchester-initiative:

posthumous-mcdouble:

Hypothesis: if women are worse at parking, it’s only because they’ve been lied to about what eight inches is their entire lives

image

(Source: collectiveassbutts, via pizza)

School

  • Class: 1+1=2
  • Homework: 2x5=10
  • Test: If Greg has 6 apples and eats one, calculate the sun's mass.

(Source: henriduplaisir, via sleeved)

(Source: innoutburgers, via pizza)